honeymoon adventures part 1: business class travelers

(subject headings: "business class," "easter island," "honeymoon")

we are classy ... business classy! so for a long time the only thing I knew about our honeymoon were the following clues ...
 1. there are beaches, and people could relax near these beaches even though the weather itself would not be "beachy."
 2. the destination is remote, and while there are activities and things to see, it is not inundated with activities.
 3. the flight is long and would require business class (maybe require is a strong word, but a business class flight would be "worth it")

so I wondered ... how long can you make it at an airport without seeing evidence of where you are going? can you make it all the way to the gate? can you get to the gate and then not look at the little sign saying the time and destination of your flight? can you put your hands over your ears and go "la la la la ...i'm not listening!" while flight attendants announce that you are on the flight to ...... please listen closely as we explain the various safety features of the flight? because I threatened the bolshevik with this.

but it didn't get to that, luckily as it may have resulted in me getting kicked off the plane... the proverbial jig was up at check-in. the bolshevik, a notorious mumbler, was using hushed tones to tell the man at the counter where we were going, while I stood several feet away pretending to fuss with the luggage, but not so much so as to arouse suspicion. it's a delicate balance.

and that's when I heard it, the man behind the counter finally deciphering the bolshevik's whispers, "oh, you mean Easter Island!"

so there you have it, it's difficult to get beyond check-in without finding out where you're going.

and then I remembered that someone at the wedding had told me we were going to Easter Island, but in the wedding haze of excitement I had forgotten immediately.

moving on ... once we got past security we were able to go in a VIP lounge for business classy people. we're special! the VIP lounge was amazing! there was a buffet, and a fancy orange juice squeezer, and an OPEN BAR! all free! and there were newspapers and a TV and a nap room and fancy arm chairs ... oh it incredible. our flight was supposed to leave at 1am, and it was delayed an hour, but I didn't even mind because the business lounge was so lovely.

when we got on the plane not one but two flight attendents introduced themselves to us and explained that they were there to help us. then they brought us champagne so we could sip it while the steerage passengers walked by. you need to put those people in their place quickly.

after takeoff we reclined our seats into beds and quickly fell asleep. Then one of our flight attendents woke us up to tell us how important eating dinner is, it's a long flight after all and we'll need our strength in the morning. so we selected wine from a wine list and got warm rolls and breadsticks, and then a large adult-sized meal with dessert.

and then we were so full that we reclined our seats into beds, pulled up our cozy comforters and fell faaaaast asleep.

I'm ruined now ... I don't know how I'll ever fly with the commoners again.